Revealing Grace

It is 2:00am and I am still awake. I don't know why but I am not the least bit tired. Perhaps it was the afternoon nap or the late night chat with a friend about life and love and the adventures that God dreams up for us when we aren't looking. Whatever it is, I am unable to rest my wandering thoughts so I will embrace them and let them roam until they grow weary. It has been quite the weekend, so it is a wonder that I haven't collapsed into the warmth of my covers. Last night's adventure included driving a 15 passenger van in heels. I was taking our kids from the Kennel to church "up the hill" and since we work every day at a youth center, I choose Saturday nights to dress nicely. I think I  did  go a little too far because I kind of looked like I was going to a benefit gala, but hey, I looked good in the White Mountains. So without shame I drove around the rez in my little black dress and my high heels and picked up 15 students, the most we have ever brou...

Last night I tried to capture the moon. Driving home over the mountains the round brilliance looked close enough to touch, big enough to wrap all the people of the world around, and clear enough to see not only the man, but the hills of cheese as well. I thought that if I could just get closer, following its glow in my car, I might be able to capture its brilliance on film. I'd never seen the moon so big and so close, and I wanted to remember it forever, to capture the truth of it so everyone would believe me, so that I would believe the memories of its grandeur. I'm telling you, it was like those pictures of the African sun setting on the plains, it was like nothing I've ever seen. So I chased it. I grabbed my roommate and my camera and chased the moon to try and get a clear view of it through the trees. When I found a spot where I could pull my car over I did all I could to catch it. I stood in the middle of the winding forest road while my roommate watched for cars. ...

The other day I went on a walk and I prayed. I prayed that God would bring back one of my students that had been MIA for over a week. I prayed that she was safe and that He would take care of her. That day at Open Kennel she walked through the doors.  God is faithful to prayer and faithful to respond when we ask, even if it is not in the manner we expect. Though there were troubles in the past weeks He brought my student back to our youth center safely, and we were able to rely on His faithfulness again as we prayed for her family and the troubles of her situation.  God has also been faithful with our programming here on the rez. Last week we had 14 girls at Bible Study. In addition to the girls there were probably 10 guys, our largest number of students to date. We got to meet with the girls as female staff and talk them through Exodus 30, a really awkward chapter. But even though the chapter is full of cubits and regulations we were able to talk about the truth of...

God's provision is a beautiful thing. Today I took one of my students to the grocery store so we could pick up some food for her family. We had gotten to know each other better over the retreat weekend, and when she expressed the need I knew I had the funds and ability to take care of it. I thought of it as relief aid, but at the same time asked her to come work at the Kennel tomorrow in exchange for the groceries, for a wise professor once told me that "to be nothing but a recipient of services denies someone of their humanity" (Jude Tiersma-Watson). So this morning I got up and ready and went to walk out the door to pick her up for our adventure. As I opened the door I was surprised to find that there was a box of food lying on our porch waiting for me. I couldn't believe my eyes, because the one day I was going to go provide food for one of my students was the one day that a random neighbor decided to leave a box of groceries on our porch. This is not someth...

Let me paint a picture for you:  It is pitch dark outside and barely 7pm. My arms are full of groceries, a computer, a random jar of half-eaten peanut butter, and other essential items. I am also on the phone. Did I mention I live in the woods? Like seriously, not even the suburb kind of woods, the straight-up outdoorsy kind of woods. Oh, and all our porch lights are out, because apparently we don't change lightbulbs.  The task: Unlocking the door to my condo. While I have succeeded in climbing the stairs without falling to my death, blindly finding the right key and putting it in the doorknob the right way proves to be more difficult than rocket science. Frustration begins.  First reaction to frustration of being locked out of my house (with the key in my hand), exclaimed to my mother who is still on the line despite the added obstacle of holding a phone to my ear while trying to juggle everything else (and despite the fact that I could have used the p...

When it comes to me and youth ministry there are a lot of impromptu dance parties, movie nights, and ice cream. And I do love it, this work here, the students I am connecting with, my awesome teammates that I live, eat, work, and breathe with- it is great. But as this week has gone by there have been little reminders that life here is not all dancing and soda pop. Little reminders like the bridge over the canyon being blocked off by two police cars, or a student not being home for church pickups because she left the night before and didn't come back, and not seeing her since. Little things that our students do or say at the Kennel remind me that this is not an easy place to live or work. I take my students home and I am reminded of the poverty and hardships, that though they might not recognize them, take a toll on their lives. But even still, I am constantly amazed by my students' tenacity and joy in the midst of this broken community. I am encouraged and boldened by the wo...