Revealing Grace

Brokenness and pain. Does it ever get easier to handle? Less impacting on the heart, the soul, the mind? Will it ever become a part of this life that doesn't tear at my emotions, causing a depth of sorrow that cannot be cured? In my line of work brokenness is the day-to-day normal routine. As I have expanded my vision here in the White Mountains, I have simply increased the types of brokenness to which I am exposed. Instead of just working with abuse, neglect, and poverty, I am now seeing what happens when that brokenness from childhood goes unhealed. And it will break your heart even more than it has already been broken.  A new facet of my ministry is in the world of drug addiction, a world I previously knew nothing about. As I get to know people in all stages of addiction, and as I read from those who have lived in this world so much longer than I, my heart swells with frustration that such depth of pain exists. You can see the pain in the eyes of the addict. It isn'...

If there is one joy in a wedding it is the love. The love between a boy and a girl, the love between their families, the love of their friends. Beyond all else, this was the most moving piece of our wedding day.   The love made possible by our Savior was an aura throughout the event. It was as if a light shone from each person and into the world around us. I'm telling you as I look back this light of love permeated souls and made hearts swell (and I am not even being dramatic here. Ask anyone who was there). It was brilliant and beautiful and profound and it struck our hearts in a way that will impact us for years. I am still overwhelmed by the love that emanated from that most wonderful day. For Cameron and I, we have chosen to live in a small town in the mountains of Arizona in order to be faithful to the ministry God has called us to. A by-product of this has been finding it harder to have deep friendships that aren't the lovely teenagers we spend most of our time...

Let me set the stage for you: Katy Perry's "Firework" is playing and I'm the only one on the dance floor. Granted it's my wedding, so I was in the mindset of It's my wedding, I'm going to dance if I want to! but it's a little weird to be doing firework hand motions all by your lonesome while a circle of tables sits around you. In fact, I had thought that my friend was going to stay, but she was all danced out so there I was, having the time of my life. As I lifted my arms into a sweet slow-motion firework motion I happened to spot Cameron right by the dance floor, so being as he was now my husband and therefore required to make a fool of himself with me, I pulled him in to join me in the spotlight. In a split second, totally like in a movie, I watched as Cameron moved toward me. I'm clearly expecting him to just do some sweet hand motions with me but instead he grabs my waist and lifts me above his head. I'm not even kidding, it was a total...

I was recently explaining to a friend the toll that ministry had taken on me over the last year. As many of you know if you have been keeping up, I spent much of last year with intense panic and anxiety attacks. With the stress of youth trauma, suicide attempts, rapes, and demonic dreams, I was sick more than I've ever been in my life. I had an awful cold for 3 straight months, losing my voice for quite a few weeks, and I was throwing up with flu-like symptoms twice in less than a year. The stress and pressure of not being able to save these kids from the bad things that happen to them had led me to a heavy dose of burn-out. Unable to have normal emotions, motivation, or peace, I had to take a step back. At the time, I didn't really understand God's plan, or if it was His plan at all. These kids were my life, I didn't have time to step back from them! I was distraught and confused as to why I was seemingly being pushed by God to back away for a month and learn how ...

As we look to the needs of our community, I believe so strongly that the answer is simple:  Relationships.   As we get to know and love each other I believe that we will be drawn to meet the needs of our neighbor. As we leave the doors of our churches as one body, one whole, feeling well loved and cared for, I believe we will be pushed to do the same for our community. To love well, to provide, to be like Jesus as we eat with our community, take care of our community, and put others needs above our own. In 2016, and even now, the challenge is to get to know each other.  Let's become more than faces to one another.  Let's become a force of love that cannot be contained.  

I can't believe that at the end of this month I will be standing next to my husband. . . husband.  I truly can't wrap my mind around it. It feels so dreamy I swear that if you wake me up I will be so mad. I never want this reality to end. God is so incredibly good. Man, He just knows what we need when we need it. I should be better about trusting Him after seeing Him in action like this. It's all so good.  I have to admit it has been quite the journey. Selflessness is not my nature. But every day I love Cameron more and every day that leads me to want to serve him more. A good reflection of our relationship with Christ, isn't it? The more we get to know Him, the more we love Him, the more we want to serve Him.  Crazy how God gives us such a picture of our relationship with Him through the imperfect relationship with another human. God's a clever fella. At any rate, as Cameron and I begin our lives together we have the privilege to begin as "mom and dad...

It's the kind of day I have been waiting for. For 2 years in the "White Mountains" I have wanted a white Christmas-y snow day and today it has arrived. It seems to me good foreshadowing that we are going to get the crazy blizzard winter I was promised when I arrived here two almost-snow-less winters ago. Right now I am sitting in my cabin-condo surrounded by huge pine trees, and combined with the Christmas lights around my window and my pellet stove fire roaring it looks like the perfect winter wonderland outside. I know most people hate snowy, dark, cold days but they are, along with rain, my favorite kind of days. Call me naive, tell me I didn't grow up in the north (trust me I've heard it all) but I find joy in layering up with mittens and scarves and scrapping the ice off my car as I go to leave for work. I am like a child as I stomp the crunchy snow beneath my feet with glee. It's winter and I love it. One thing I love about winter is that it makes eve...