Pumpkins, Friends, Joy



"Funny thing about joy, 
is that you only really find it 
when you are too busy having fun 
to go looking for it."

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Post about Jeff

When you go through a divorce, so much is public. Heck, hundreds of people watched you make vows to another person and less than two years later you have to announce that it has crashed and burned. No matter how kind and understanding people are, you are wrought with the shame of the situation. It is embarrassing to be sure, no matter what the reasons behind the divorce were. So when I started dating Jeff, I found myself keeping much of our relationship close to my chest. We all know I love him and he is incredible, but I have found myself resisting the desire to write about our love in detail. I have had such public pain and hardship. Now I seem to want to protect my joy and happiness within the walls of my own home and heart. But I will tell you this: Jeff is perhaps the best human I've ever met.  He is perfect in his imperfections. He is pure of heart and kind in spirit. He is a hard worker, a precious gift giver, a servant who has the patience of a saint. He love...
Read more

Perhaps the Moon will Heal Me

 I wish they would prescribe nature instead of medicine and stars instead of shots. I wish I could gaze upon wildflowers and the cells in my body would be healed. I want to lay in the grass and soak in the sun and be told that I have accomplished all the treatment I need. I want to meet a doctor on a mountaintop and have them say that s'mores and bonfires are the cure for what ails me.  I wish that instead of doctors offices I was prescribed beaches and sand beneath my toes. The answer! (they will shout) is MORE VACATION! The pill! (they will declare) is higher quality chocolate and puppies that lick your toes.  I wish that instead of the smells of saline and surface cleaners I could go to an appointment and be handed a drink in a coconut and be greeted by sunshine and a large man playing the ukulele.  Instead of death, I would see life. Instead of suffering, I would see joy.  I wish that the answer to my problems was to spend more time in the mountains, gaining...
Read more

Chemo Definitely Sucks

Image
Hi. I am tired. But I want to write while it is all still fresh. Today, I conquered my first chemo session. Granted, the effects of it won't hit for a few days, but to get through today was a serious accomplishment. I don't like to talk about this being hard because I know a lot of other people with cancer have it a lot harder than me, but for today, I am going to go ahead and be proud that I survived the day. The day really wasn't too bad. I was there from 10am-5pm. I was in the cold cap for 5 hours and that is honestly the worst part. It is so tight and it feels like someone laid a bunch of popsicles straight onto your head. It hurts your jaw and made me dizzy. But I know it will be worth it. The oncologist told me to be optimistic about my hair and that is a big deal. They don't encourage your optimism very often. There were moments of pain, moments where I was so cold, moments where I really had to pee but needed the nurse to unhook my IV so I wouldn...
Read more