Thursday, February 18, 2016

Marriage Advice from an Amateur

Today we are going to talk about marriage since, you know, I have a month and a half of wisdom going on over here in Show Low, Arizona and I know you are dying to hear it.

Just call me the wise woman of the forest.

Anyways. . . In the weeks surrounding our wedding a lot of people wanted to give us some advice. It generally fell into two camps, either "marriage is going to be really hard" or "marriage is awesome!" We definitely appreciated the honesty of camp one but preferred camp two.

As we moved forward through our wedding and began life together you would be amazed at how many people began to tell us that our happiness won't last. People would ask how it was going and we would respond honestly with answers like, "Marriage is great! It's so much fun and we simply love getting to do life together!"

4 out of 5 people responded with, "It won't last."

No joke.

This was a slightly frustrating response. And here is why (although you can probably guess):

I believe that marriage is what you make it. I know that Cameron and I are young and we have just started out on this beautiful adventure, but as we change and our lives change, we can choose joy. I have seen plenty of couples lose the joy of marriage as time passed, but I have also seen many couples who are happily in love after 20+ years. The latter is what Cameron and I are choosing to believe in. We choose to learn, to grow, to find the joy and life in the adventures, no matter what comes our way. 

This doesn't mean we don't have bad days, we do. We fight, we get mad, we get frustrated. We disagree about silly things and important things, and sometimes (ok, a lot of times) I cry. Its just what I do. I have a soft soul.

(Funny side note: When Cameron got me noise-canceling headphones I was watching tv and he jumped on my back to hug me. This scared the mess out of me and I ended up crying inexplicably for about an hour. It happens. He was so confused lol.) 

But the disagreements, the hard days, the good times- it all works together to build in us a stronger foundation. We choose to place our foundation in Christ (which does take effort), to learn contentment (even when things don't go our way), to admit our wrongs (that's a hard one), and to choose joy. And no matter what people tell us, we believe that it will last! 

So here is to a marriage that is ever-changing, transforming, and growing. A marriage that lives every day in gratitude for what God has given us in each other (that was in my vows btw), and to growing old with the person that knows you better than anyone in the world and still likes you.

 I think a lady I met over break said it best when she emailed me the other day:

Things will be different, but in such a beautiful way.







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