The Art of Crumbling and Getting Back Up Again
I took a student on her very first hike recently and every time we hit the slightest elevation change (and I am talking a few inches of difference) her whole body would instantly crumble. In seconds she would be folded into herself as she took to the ground to hug the dirt. I would coax and pull and try to talk sense into her, but her fear was overwhelming and she couldn't make herself move. Eventually I would pick her up under her arms and make her move her feet over the small incline or decline as we walked on to the next change in elevation. It didn't matter how many she survived, at each turn going up or down or over rocks, she would crumble again. There was no sense to it. Simply her fear got the best of her. Often, this is what has happened to me over the past year as I tried to emotionally navigate my life post-cancer. I've put on a tough front, I've acted like I don't need help, but with the slightest change in my path, I crumbled. Something as s