A Post about Jeff

When you go through a divorce, so much is public. Heck, hundreds of people watched you make vows to another person and less than two years later you have to announce that it has crashed and burned. No matter how kind and understanding people are, you are wrought with the shame of the situation. It is embarrassing to be sure, no matter what the reasons behind the divorce were.

So when I started dating Jeff, I found myself keeping much of our relationship close to my chest. We all know I love him and he is incredible, but I have found myself resisting the desire to write about our love in detail.

I have had such public pain and hardship. Now I seem to want to protect my joy and happiness within the walls of my own home and heart.

But I will tell you this:

Jeff is perhaps the best human I've ever met. 

He is perfect in his imperfections.
He is pure of heart and kind in spirit.
He is a hard worker, a precious gift giver, a servant who has the patience of a saint.

He loves me as much as I love him and our love for one another grows every day. I have taught him how to dance silly in the kitchen and he has taught me how to let go of my worries and settle my fears. He is gentle with my emotions and he strengthens me as a woman, a cancer survivor, and a Christian.

He is, I believe, the best thing to ever happen to me.

I did not truly know or understand the beauty of mutual love and respect until Jeff came into my life. He has turned my world to color. He has brought me immeasurable joy.

Perhaps in the days to come I will detail more of our story to my readers. Perhaps I will tell you of the myriad ways that he has shown me love.

But for now?

For now I will simply let the details of our relationship settle softly into the lining of my own tattered heart.

Comments

  1. Momma DApril 18, 2019 at 1:14 PM

    Beautiful Meredeth, just like you❤

    ReplyDelete
  2. MichelleApril 18, 2019 at 1:48 PM

    Many women can relate to your heartache and I pray even more can relate to your joy.
    I do not know you - but I am a divorced woman who remarried the most amazing man.
    There is hope for all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MeredithApril 18, 2019 at 1:58 PM

      Thank you for your comment Michelle! I was desperate for any stories of women who found love again after heartbreak when my husband left. I am so happy to now have a story of hope and so glad to hear that you have found joy and love too!!

      Delete
  3. UnknownApril 18, 2019 at 2:16 PM

    Jeff is quite remarkable. Congratulations to you both.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousApril 18, 2019 at 5:15 PM

    thank you for sharing. very inspirational.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Susan OApril 18, 2019 at 5:23 PM

    Some very good people in New Mexico -- so glad you found one!

    ReplyDelete
  6. UnknownMay 8, 2019 at 5:38 PM

    This is beautiful, sweet Meredith. I just talked to your mom and she told me how to find your blog. I look forward to more posts!!! 🤗

    ReplyDelete
  7. UnknownMay 8, 2019 at 5:38 PM

    I'm not unknown..... lol...... It's Aunt Debi.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Endings and Beginnings

 I've had a lot of endings that are also beginnings.  In fact, I've lived in Jeff's house for 3.5 years and that's the longest I've lived in a single home since I left Virginia at the age of 16. For over half of my life I have been without roots. I've lived in 9 homes in the last 12 years. That is absurd.  And the truth is, I don't want to be rootless anymore. I want to settle in, build something I am proud of, and never have to pack another moving box in my life. This restless, wandering soul wants to plant my feet on the same ground for more years than I can count and raise my daughter like I was raised in Virginia- with lasting friends and mother-daughter book clubs and people you grow up with. I haven't had a single place I've felt was truly my home since I left Richmond as a teenager, and I am ready to change that.  So in one week, we move to Tennessee. It is a place where a lot of our dreams lie. It is where Jeff will continue a career that he
Read more

Faith Within Suffering

 I didn't talk about God for a while.  When I was younger, I never stopped. My oldest friend and I laughed last weekend about how I would pray for her to attend church when we were kids and tell her about my prayers. When I was in college, it was my purpose. On the reservation it was my profession.  When the waves of suffering hit, I still professed God's goodness for a while, but eventually it became too much. The waves kept knocking me down every time I tried to get up. I was sick in a cancer ward. My relationship with church completely upended. My marriage destroyed.  I stopped talking about my God because I couldn't make sense of my suffering or anyone else's pain. I didn't have any of my youthful certainty. I just had a whole bunch of questions and a whole lot of anger.  Until life got better. Until I got perspective. Until I stood in the snow among the Tetons and said to the wind, "Ok, God, I'm ready. Let's do this again. I'm with you." 
Read more

Five Years After the Divorce

Image
It has been five years, this December, since a judge declared my marriage officially over. It was the culmination of the worst season of my whole life. It was the end of something I had believed was forever. It was a season of bitter tears, struggles with depression and thoughts of suicide, and complete and utter hopelessness. Everything I had believed in had been shattered and in the end, I hadn't been chosen by the one who I chose to marry. I believed the false narrative that I hadn't been good enough, strong enough, or healthy enough. I was certain happiness would never find me again.  Over the next five years, I had to rediscover myself. I had to relearn my strength, my worth, my value. I had to heal from what had happened. I had to be angry and learn how to let that anger go. I lost my relationship with church and grew new relationships with a team of doctors when I got a cancer diagnosis just four months after my divorce was finalized. I had to figure out who God was, who
Read more