Rain rain don't go away!

This past weekend was tough (even though I had a lot of fun and rest). I really missed home...and Blackbird coffee. I was feeling kind of sad, kind of down. And here is what is weird....today I feel SO happy. Like, really happy. I walked outside this morning and the ground was wet and it smelled like RAIN. Rain! I had to wear a jacket because it was actually chilly, and I had to keep myself from skipping all the way to class. I read a book for FUN, I laughed with my new FRIENDS and I had coffee TWICE. Ok, with that last comment you might think the reason for this enthusiasm is the coffee in my veins, but that is not it! God is just SO faithful. When I get sad it is like He says,

"Hey Meredith! Look! Look at all these fun people around you! Look at the rain I brought for you! Hey Meredith, remember when I told you I loved you? And that I would always take care of you? Guess what...I meant it! I really do love you!"

Isn't it nice to realize that every little good thing is a gift showing that God loves us? I mean it. Today I took special notice of every nice word someone said or every time I smiled or laughed, and let me tell you, I had the best day! I have decided that no nice thing should go unsaid, and I am seeing that it really makes the world a happier place when people say nice things. Today someone told me I was stylish...yea buddy! I feel quite pleased. See, it is the little things! The realization that if I feel lonely, someone else probably does too. So let's have a party! Let's forget our homework and eat froyo and dance. Let's go smell the rain and wear a scarf. Let's choose to see the joys instead of the sorrows. Let's make the world a better place. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Endings and Beginnings

 I've had a lot of endings that are also beginnings.  In fact, I've lived in Jeff's house for 3.5 years and that's the longest I've lived in a single home since I left Virginia at the age of 16. For over half of my life I have been without roots. I've lived in 9 homes in the last 12 years. That is absurd.  And the truth is, I don't want to be rootless anymore. I want to settle in, build something I am proud of, and never have to pack another moving box in my life. This restless, wandering soul wants to plant my feet on the same ground for more years than I can count and raise my daughter like I was raised in Virginia- with lasting friends and mother-daughter book clubs and people you grow up with. I haven't had a single place I've felt was truly my home since I left Richmond as a teenager, and I am ready to change that.  So in one week, we move to Tennessee. It is a place where a lot of our dreams lie. It is where Jeff will continue a career that he
Read more

Faith Within Suffering

 I didn't talk about God for a while.  When I was younger, I never stopped. My oldest friend and I laughed last weekend about how I would pray for her to attend church when we were kids and tell her about my prayers. When I was in college, it was my purpose. On the reservation it was my profession.  When the waves of suffering hit, I still professed God's goodness for a while, but eventually it became too much. The waves kept knocking me down every time I tried to get up. I was sick in a cancer ward. My relationship with church completely upended. My marriage destroyed.  I stopped talking about my God because I couldn't make sense of my suffering or anyone else's pain. I didn't have any of my youthful certainty. I just had a whole bunch of questions and a whole lot of anger.  Until life got better. Until I got perspective. Until I stood in the snow among the Tetons and said to the wind, "Ok, God, I'm ready. Let's do this again. I'm with you." 
Read more

Five Years After the Divorce

Image
It has been five years, this December, since a judge declared my marriage officially over. It was the culmination of the worst season of my whole life. It was the end of something I had believed was forever. It was a season of bitter tears, struggles with depression and thoughts of suicide, and complete and utter hopelessness. Everything I had believed in had been shattered and in the end, I hadn't been chosen by the one who I chose to marry. I believed the false narrative that I hadn't been good enough, strong enough, or healthy enough. I was certain happiness would never find me again.  Over the next five years, I had to rediscover myself. I had to relearn my strength, my worth, my value. I had to heal from what had happened. I had to be angry and learn how to let that anger go. I lost my relationship with church and grew new relationships with a team of doctors when I got a cancer diagnosis just four months after my divorce was finalized. I had to figure out who God was, who
Read more